Snap Unhappy

My husband’s laptop is the keeper of family photographs so when I was asked for one this week by my publisher – I asked him to email me a few to choose from.

It was taking a long time –  with him this means he’s asleep or watching Braveheart again – OR that there is  a problem.

I went to find him and he was at the laptop having a great time scrolling through hundreds of photos –  none of them of me. His push bike was photographed from every angle, the dog was snapped in various poses –  awake asleep and covered in mud. There was even a blocked toilet (I didn’t ask) and a shot of his favourite kebab shop.

“Where am I?” I asked.

He looked aghast. I think  he thought I was having memory or existential issues.

“Photographs of me. Where are they ?”

“I was short on disk space so I think I may have deleted you” he confessed.

You know that saying about happy marriages –  that a couple should never let the sun set on a disagreement? Well my version of that is that you should never accept an apology until the season has changed.  We are officially not speaking.

Unless until he finds a  recent photograph of me that makes me look like Nicole Kidman.

12 comments to Snap Unhappy

  • He had the bike, the muddy dog and the blocked toilet, and not you? Oops. If chocolates, flowers and perfume don’t arrive in the next 24 hours, move out and take residence in a posh hotel. On his credit card.

  • Diddy

    Some women are too perfect to photograph

  • Anna May

    Fran and Diddy,
    I am still in a super-sulk about this.
    Anna May x

  • Julie Pereira

    what do you expect given he has the Dog’s photo on his mobile as his screen sve and dog does look very cute? whay does he need a photo of you when he’s with you for 12 hours of the day? I don’t get photos really unless the people in them are dead.

  • I’m with you; I generally think that a season is about the right length of time to hold a grudge for. My wife goes further, she snapped at me the other day after remembering that I had eaten the last Cream Egg after Easter 2001. Apparently chocolate is important?

    I’d quite like to see the photo of the kebab shop.

  • The man has you engraved onto his eyelids—— awake or asleep he sees you!!!!

  • Anna May

    Glen – welcome ! You beast. You ate the last creme egg in 2001 and she’s talking to you already? Your wife is a pushover !
    Moya….No. That would be the dog.
    Julie, everyone needs a least one good photo for their memorial card!
    Anna May x

  • Pauline

    I think I spot the mistake: “My husband’s laptop is the keeper of family photographs.” Insecure on so many levels – laptops get stolen; programmes get corrupted by viruses; husbands get corrupted by bicycle porn. I recommend Photoshop or a similar site to save photos and marriage.

    Meanwhile, of course, a season is too short; he must never be allowed to forget…

  • Pauline

    PS – I know I’m being judgemental, but what do you expect from a man who likes the film ‘Braveheart’?

  • Anna May

    Hello Pauline,
    I think I may have to remove his office door so I can keep a constant eye on him – monitor Braveheart hours, check that the bicycle porn (love that expression!) is suitably soft etc. Some friends did just that recently with their 15 year old son……but then he ran away.
    Anna May

  • Debbie

    I don’t want to labour the point but in our house, I’m the camera & photot keeper for that exact same reason…..

    I’m happy to come and take a photo of you!
    x

  • Get your revenge – photoshop his head out of all pictures and replace him with – oh, I dunno… George Clooney?