I  tried to stay cool and wore a big floppy hat but it wilted in the heat and the brim ended up blocking my view and chafing my chin so I had to take it off.

Highlights were that my bag of jumbo sized chocolate buttons oozed into chocolate sauce within minutes of sitting down and made a very good hot dip for the Coconut Mushrooms – see previous post. Also that we were ‘buggied’  from our car parking space to the  entrance which made me laugh out loud all the way for no particular reason, and that was before I suffered heatstroke.

Federer, Murray and the divine red-knickered Serena Williams didn’t even break sweat as they thundered about  Centre Court.  But I, sat down, was paddling in it within thirty minutes. And I can confirm that perspiration-heavy wet linen (as worn by the row of Camilla lookie likies behind me) smells of green beans cooking even when very posh and previously fragrant people  wear it. Make up melts, too, I found mascara streaks and strawberry kiss lipstick marks on my hands, forearms and cleveage when I peeled my clothes off last night.

The stewards politely requested that anyone  who was going to faint because of the heat gave them plenty of prior warning before  keeling over,  and my sister’s nose got kissed too hard by a sunbeam which is why today she is sporting a Wimbledon blister with pride. It’s like a mini tennis ball and a reminder of our perfect day.