Denim in the Dark

I heart my jeans. So much so that I think my Pappy’s, Pappy’s, Pappy’s Pappy may have been a cowboy.

We are celebrating 30 years of bum coverage together this year. M&S circa 1985. Then I found out my daughters don’t share the love.

“Embarrassing!” they said during their denim intervention, and they took me […]

Percy, Annie and Emma


Last week’s finale of ‘Line of Duty’ got me so trussed up in whodunnit bafflement that there were a few moments when I was sat wondering whether I was somehow involved in the ambush?

But, incredibly, there has been an even finer example of losing the plot since last Wednesday. It comes with today’s […]

Socks and Shareholders

I bought a bra from Marks and Spencer that was such a tight fit it reminded me of that party game where you have to put a blown up balloon into a sock against the clock. Yes indeedy, in my family we really do know how to enjoy ourselves…..

The bra had been ordered online […]

Suits Me

I’ve had a lot of difficulty getting a new swimsuit. The rules of purchase are no cleveage – chest, front or back bottom, no hello sailor gold or button trims, no cups inside the bra that are shaped like sweetheart cabbages and no built in tightly elasticated girdles that would stop the blood supply to […]

All Under Control

My nipples are closer to my face than to my navel for the first time in two decades. I have Rigby and Peller to thank for this stellar feat of engineering.

I have always worn M&S bras and have been complaining that they don’t make them like they used to, muttering darkly about carrier bag […]

Strop Shop Flop

My laptop has thrown a Brendan Cole (aka a strop) and won’t play by the rules, so I did an emergency dash to John Lewis for a new one last night.

I had 23 minutes before they closed and spent 12 of those dousing myself in Bobbi Brown and Versace fragrances and chose…… a 3 […]

The Jordan Tell All/Tell Nothing Jig

Katie Jordan Price Andre is entitled to keep schtum about her rape experience. It is her right to choose although my view is that to protect herself and other women from the mystery man in question, reporting her attack to the police would have been the right, albeit difficult, thing to do.

What puzzles me […]