Hot Lips

It’s all India Knight’s fault.She recommended Lord and Berry’s eye kohl in her Sunday Times column and like the product lemming I am, I ordered it. She praised how deep black it is, and easy to apply.
It’s not in pencil form but comes in a lipstick case.

The other night I went to the theatre with a friend to see ‘The Importance of Being Earnest’ being slaughtered by a cast of British hammers. When the end was thankfully nigh I reached into my bag found my lipstick and applied it in the dark.

The lights came up and my friend turned to me, raised her eyebrows and said “What the F**k?” I nodded and said “Totally” thinking she was referring to the stoopid interpretation of the play. Outside the theatre we air kissed and went our separate ways.

On the bus home I was thinking to myself that I must be looking mighty fine in the hair, face and clothes departments because I got a lot of looks, and second looks from my fellow passengers.

Mr Anna May was asleep when I got in so I made a cup of Horlicks watched Celebrity Big Brother for the first time and thought Kellie Maloney was Lorraine Kelly’s grandma. Then it was lights off downstairs and up to the bathroom to do the teeth and hair brushing and face wash routine.

I am still laughing at what I saw in the mirror. In the theatre I hadn’t applied my fuschia pink lippy, instead I had slathered my lips in creamy black kohl.

2 comments to Hot Lips

  • I bet your friend was thinking, ‘Well, she obviously likes her new look, so who am I to criticise and say anything?’ Brilliant.

  • Julie Mangan

    that product is excellent but what on earth must you have looked like? you must have looked like a Goth! x