Last week’s finale of ‘Line of Duty’ got me so trussed up in whodunnit bafflement that there were a few moments when I was sat wondering whether I was somehow involved in the ambush?
But, incredibly, there has been an even finer example of losing the plot since last Wednesday. It comes with today’s launch of the latest ‘Leading Ladies’ ad campaign from M&S.
At hooooooooooooooooooooooooge expense Annie Leibovitz and her camera were hauled over the Atlantic to photograph a collection of British women reclining on Camber Sands.
Emma Thompson is there, legs akimbo and laughing maniacally. Other feministas lurking in the long grass include Baroness Doreen Lawrence, Rita Ora and Alex Wek. They appear to have been directed to look po faced and to gaze into the middle distance. Oh, and everyone is dressed in instantly forgettable frocks and scarves.
Meanwhile, off Camber Sands and back on the High Street, women shoppers know that M&S women’s fashion is a chamber of horrors.
There’s the Nuns-Only collection of skirts and cardigans in navy and beige. A pyscho-daub stoned off your head corner where everything has an assymetric hem. Oh, and the why not match your pleated skirt to your wicker shopping trolley on wheels range, available only in pearlescent neutral shades? All items are available in size 8 or size 24, only.
Moving along to their undies there are rails of scanties for to women who twerk for a living, but for any gal who just wants to cover her ass prettily but cheaply the choice is a five pack of parachutes. Ideal if you want to craft a Yurt from your knickers.
I have a radical idea for the M&S fashion team. Design some fresh, wearable good quality and great value clothes and photograph them on hangers to sell them. Let all the inspirational women go free – back to work doing what they do best – and stop insulting the intelligence of us less inspirational women.
Until that happens my M&S pound will only be spent on Percy Pigs.And I do hope my Percys are safe from a cheesey. top dollar Annie Leibovitz /Miss Piggy sales campaign?