Happy 2014 x

All Christmas confused, that’s me. After all the woop woop and routine busting I am not sure what day of the week it is any more.

And I have sustained a Christmas injury playing snap with my son. We are both so competitive that we almost chopped a coffee table in two as we played […]

Strictly EPIC

It was a hootin’ and a hollerin’ final sponsored by Kleenex.

In the last analysis:

I’d like Sophie Ellis Bextor to be my son’s wife because she is so sweet. Although I hope I wouldn’t scare her.

I’d like Natalie Gunmede to be my boss because she’d surely be super-understanding about any sudden urges I […]

Ho Ho Ho

Don’t say I never give you anything. Here are three free Christmas jokes:


What does the Queen call her Christmas broadcast? The One Show.


Mary and Joseph. They had a very stable relationship.


What does Miley Cyrus have for Christmas lunch? Twerky.




An Ocado man came to my house today. He was the jolliest man in creation. As well as dropping off some groceries for my son I thought he was going to croon a few bars of ‘What a Wonderful World’.

After two and a half minutes acquaintance he said goodbye by placing his hands on […]

Here Come the Gals

So, just the girly-whirlies are left in Strictly. I will miss Patrick’s bum very much, in particular how it was situated so close to his kidneys and had a rhythm all of it’s own.

Big gob Brendan might blow it for Sophie if he doesn’t keep his cool with the judges. He arrives at their […]

Strictly Piles and Delia

My analysis of this week’s Strictly is that grumpmeister Len must have piles.

Poor Susanna and Kevinfromheneverevengotstarted – they were out of the Swingathon before they’d even swung. And she’s gorgeous, so why do her seeeexxxxy moves make me wish she’d put a cardigan on?

Where is the eye contact between Natalie and Artem? I […]

Strictly Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

I am all gay man when it comes to musicals. My proof is that I have seen Les Miserables eight times and can singalonga to evrything in the West End. So Strictly AND Musicals? Best night everever.

Panya’s Charleston was a real smilealong dance. Can’t be snitty about Chitty. But er, Craig can. An 8???????