2011 Wimble-done

Boo Hoo. Wimble-done for me this year. I have ongoing numb bum from sitting on Centre Court for almost ten hours yesterday. I’ve just watched the TV highlights – there is a close up of me cheering and foaming at the mouth, not with excitement, but with coconut mushrooms.

Princess Beatrice was in the […]

Mouths and Pregnant Moths

Just call me Bearella Gryllis.

I ate a moth. Actually, I drank one. I had a horrible dream that a giant, furry insect was part way into my mouth with it’s spindly legs overhanging my bottom lip and trailing onto my chin. It scared me awake and I took a feel better soon slug of […]

Mankles not Cankles

On Saturday morning I was reading the Times Magazine fashion pages. There were pictures of various funky fellers in this Summer’s high fashion fix, they had the bottoms of their trousers rolled up to display their ankles, described in the piece as ‘mankles’.

I’m just a gawper not a follower when it comes to fashion. […]

Capricorns and Peonies

I met an old neighbour of mine in the street yesterday while I was walking my dog. After saying hello the first question I asked was “And how are you?” He answered, “Not great, I have been having a lot of trouble with my penis.”

“Peonies?” I asked hopefully with a lot of eyebrow action.


The Tousled Blonde Hair of The Law

Which celebrity would you choose to arrest you if you got on the wrong side of the law? I bagsy George Clooney, as long as he was armed with a pair of fluffy handcuffs.

Pity the bloke who got arrested earlier today and found London Mayor Boris Johnson heading up the dawn raid – http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2001046/Boris-Johnson-police-raiders-bust-drugs-suspect-Rambo.html


Bean Bags and Wine

We arrived en extended famille at the spa hotel. All thirteen of us sprinted to our rooms, ripped off our clothes and grabbed our paperbacks eager to be first one ready to relax. Then, in white towelling robes and matching slippers we were gathered for a Tour of the Facility. It was like stepping into […]