Stars and Stripey Pyjamas

Overall I declare it dull this year – but not dull enough to duvet dive any time before dawn. I watched the lot and passed my husband on the stairs at six o clock this morning when he was on his way down and off to work. My job, watching the 2010 Oscars, was done.   According to him staying up all night to watch celebrity trash tv  is a sure sign of mental illness. But what does he know ? The man wouldn’t recognise Meryl Streep if she sat on his lap.

Where were Brangelina? And Tom and Katie? And Nicole and Keith? There was a lot of sparkle missing. I felt that I made the effort, I wore a diamonique brooch on my stripey pyjamas, so why couldn’t they be there?

‘Nood’ was the dress shade trend. Or nude if you are British, which was rood if you’d  been waiting up all night for some astonishing splashes of colour.

Sarah Jessica Parker was wearing a sex game inspired dress that had a strangely placed strap around her throat and was just an orange and a plastic bag away from, well,   I don’t know but I’ve read about it…..

J Lo seemed to have an occasional table hidden under the left hand side of her oddity  dress. She could do a cover of Jake the Peg wearing it as there was plently of room for a third leg under there.. 

Melanie Griffiths had snipped a couple of stitches on top of her head so she could smile with her  (sponsored by Walls Sausages) plastic fantastic lips. 

Someone needs to tell Colin Firth that  John Frieda  Frizz-Ease is currently 3 for 2 at Superdrug. And why does he have teeth the colour of daffodils?

Claudia Winkleman chatted with her panel of experts in the Sky Studios in London. One was David Baddiel who mostly answered her inane questions with, “I can’t say, I haven’t seen the film.” And Ronnie Ancona was too fascinated by what she looked like on the studio monitors to discuss anything sensibly. She was horribly self conscious and tried hard, for five whole hours,  to be a glammapuss but didn’t get anywhere near.

Gorgeous George was there in the front row with his girlfriend. She was a bit proprietorial for my liking. It was the way she sat next to him I objected to.

I’m resting up from today in preparation for 2011.

7 comments to Stars and Stripey Pyjamas

  • Julie Pereira

    I think you should throw an OSCARS party next year and all your blog-fans can come round in our PJs with some Ovaltine to share your settee and watch the evening unfold. I thought Vera Farmiglia’s comment about looking like a “rose in bloom” was accurate (she looked mad) and that Kate Winslet is just trying too hard. Perhaps if your book is made into a film w(hich would be fantabuloso) you can go to the OSCARS and take me with you. We can find some frocks and bling to wear. I think Tom Ford looked great and Mo’nique was lovely too.

  • Debbie

    Wooohooo – it’s Oscar time.
    Or more commonly know MEEEEEOW time 🙂
    Oh where to start…..

    Your gorgeous George (and I think after this you may never speak to me again) should have taken the jibes a little more cheerfully. Unless he was auditioning for Grumpy Old Men.

    SJP looked like she had been tangoed to in inch of her life – she looked more like Scarey Bradshaw than Carrie Bradshaw.

    It’s not all doom & gloom on the frock front, there were some stunners. Charlize Theron and Sandra Bullock jump to mind…

    Please please please can we have an Oscar pyjama party next year.
    I promise to bring red wine, pizza and popcorn.

  • Anna May

    Hi Julie, I’m with you on Hatie Katie – she thinks she’s Meryl Streep in training.

    Debbie, I will agree that Gorgeous George wasn’t oozing charm as per usual – but isn’t it obvious why ? The girlfriend was clearly getting on his nerves. I rest my case.

    Julie AND Debbie,
    41 million people watched it on telly last night whilst you two were getting your zeds. That makes you lightweights and only maybes for next year’s pj party. Sorry but that’s showbiz.

    Anna May x

  • Iwould just like to say how much I value and appreciate the effort and hard work that Anna-May undertakes on behalf of all us lightweights—– she also advocates world peace and enjoys working with children and animals!!!!!!

  • Pauline

    Totally appreciate the sacrifice Anna-May undertook on our behalf, although staying up for the red carpet parade of frocks would have sufficed. I wouldn’t worry too much about Gorgeous George’s proprietorial girlfriend – when they get to that stage, his modus operandi is to run away. He’ll be single again in no time – mark my words.

  • Julie Pereira

    Ok – if you’re not inviting us, Debs and I are having our own bash and inviting Gorgeous George too our settee for an all-nighter (read into that wahat you wish!). I am still reeling from Sigourney Weaver’s red dress which looked like bedsheets.

  • Debbie

    Annmay – not only will we have Gorgeous George but our diamonique will out glitter yours… Our bash will be the Vanity Fair Party of pyjama parties…..