Dawning of the Day

Have I have mentioned before that I am like something out of The Exorcist in the morning? I do get pleasanter as the day goes on. Mostly.   This morning I was stirred from my sleep by monkey noises. My husband was making them as he hopped into his work clothes. Seeing my eyes open he hollered, getting louder with each word  “Half past eight, half past sodding eight!” I deduced from this high decibel time check that he was an hour and a half late for work already.

At speed he squirted deodorant, brushed his teeth, took hay fever medication and splashed some CK smellies down his shirt collar and the waist of his trousers before sprinting off. downstairs.  I was  confused to see him getting ready for work because I actually thought  it was a Sunday morning.

I dropped back off to sleep and within minutes was again awoken by my husband. He was dressed for bed (starkers) and smelt of porridge and honey. I was baffled as to why he was climbing back into bed on a work morning when he was going to be at least two hours late already.  I can be irresistible – but never before dusk so it wouldn’t be that. My eyebrows demanded “What the bloody hell…..?”  He ssssshed me and answered “Let me sleep, it’s only quarter to five”.

I have no idea what that was all about, but fear we are both en route to a double room in a home for the bewildered.

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