Last night I was idling in the till queue at Morrisons supermarket. I always join the longest one so I can read all their junk magazines for free. Although I would never actually pay for these mags, I couldn’t survive a week without knowing who and what is in between their shiny pages.
So there I was queueing and studying a photograph of some starlet perched on her fishburner in full evening dress inside Get A Life magazine when the person in front spoke to me . He was about 40, wearing a pin stripe suit, a floral kipper tie and plimsolls. “You have periods, still?” he enquired in an eastern european accent. Sanitary towels which I buy for myself and my three daughters are currently on offer for £1 a pack in Morrisons and I was, I admit, stocking up. The towers of discounted packs on the conveyor belt probably inspired him to ask the question ,which silenced me, the till operator and the couple behind me in the queue. He paid for his litre of vodka and jumbo pack of Doritos, nodded farewell to us all, and headed out.
Was this man shocked that someone as old and crumbly as me was still menstruating ? Or did he think I was so lush and gorgeous that I could be his babymother and his question was a quirky romantic overture ? OR did he say something else completely that I mis-heard as “You have periods, still?”
I am still puzzling over the episode, and have marked the date down in my diary as a rare occasion when I was lost for words.
What a weirdo! you cannot possibly have misheard him -but perhaps he said “Where did you get these as I want to buy some for my wife and daughters?” or “Do you want to go in front me given you don’t have many items?” but I don’t think so. Men who wear plimsoles and suits at the same time are to be avoided. Maybe he thought you were anticipating an outbreak of Swine Fever and thought they were face masks?
Anyway, more importantly – what a complete bargain you got at Morrissons. I do think if the NHS can give free condoms to men, they should gtive free ST’s to us girls.
Absolutely Julie, and free wine and chocolate once a month, too.
Anna May x
I’m absolutely gobsmacked that someone actually commented on the contents of your shopping basket…
It’s “baby mama” – much more hip and yo down wif da kidz in da ‘hood.
yo yo ho, dat’s me den
Anna May x
I think that the brief spell of summer weather is causing an outbreak of bizarre comments/ outspoken behaviour. I got onto the train on Saturday with a ridiculously heavy suitcase to be greeted by another passenger offering to help me, of which I happily accepted unaware of the condition for such help. “Now I have helped you can give me your number.” It was a statement not a question, to which I mumbled my refusal and then ran to find my seat!
Also great bargain at a pound!!
Julie, I think we ladies use the condoms too, albeit more indirectly…
Marie, I went to the same Convent School as Julie where we were taught that only rabbits have sex which might explain any gaps in her knowledge !
Anna May x
My stock answer for that sort of question: “Why do you want to know?” Works best if asked in a tone of worried concern.